Oct 31, 2011

Understanding The Nature Of Interpersonal Skills

For the balanced, happy, successful individual, solid interpersonal skills are a must have characteristic. Understanding these skills will dramatically increase your confidence towards others. Remember, confidence is essential for good interpersonal skills. Understanding how people function will make you better at functioning in a social settings and relating to anyone. Think for a moment about the qualities you look for in a friend. The chances are you are thinking about 'mutual benefit.'To say that we look to gain from friendships is not being selfish, but it is being truthful. However, true friendships are also built on a desire to give something back whether this is materially, with laughter or as a shoulder to cry on. It often feels better to give than it does to receive. True friendship is therefore built on the principle of mutual need and benefit. People tend to gravitate towards others who are most like them. Our friendship groups tend to consist of likeminded individuals. We tend to share common interests like taste in music, attitudes, beliefs. Regarding the last couple of points, think about how much you judge others according to the company that they keep.
Many of the prejudices we form stem from the people we see them hanging around with.You will already know how easy it is for you to strike up a rapport with people who are like you. If conversation ever starts to dry up, you can start talking about sports or interests you share in common. In these circumstances we feel more relaxed, secure and extroverted in our surroundings. So what happens once you get taken away from your comfort zone?Of course, not every person you need to form a relationship with is going to have similar interests to yourself. The people I am referring to here include colleagues and business partners. 'What (you might ask) am I supposed to do here? How can I build rapport with these people that I share nothing in common with? There is a technique known to body language experts called 'mirroring'. Mirroring is a conscious effort to relax an individual by affecting the subconscious region of the mind.If this sounds a bit twilight zone for you then I urge you to read on, for mirroring is actually very simple.We mentioned earlier how people enjoy being around similar people; however, being similar does not just mean wearing the same type of clothes but the type of signals we give off. Psychologists reckon that 95% of all communication is non verbal which means that there is a massive window of opportunity to communicate with people, even those who you do not share anything in common with culturally!
Mirroring is used all over nature. Scientists studying wolves have noticed how the rest of the pack will ape the behaviour of the alpha male. Even our day to day life, mirroring can be observed all the time. The next time you are on a date watch how your date reacts to you. If they follow your hand gestures, smile when you do, speak in the same tone, then the chances are you are on to a winner. In a business setting making a good impression is vital, so use mirroring to your advantage. If you are looking to make a good impression on your boss then follow their lead by adopting a similar posture, volume of voice, similar facial patterns and nodding when they nod. There is, of course, a bit of common sense needed here or you will end up looking a bit strange or even being offensive! Try to incorporate mirroring subtly into your behaviour pattern because it needs to be registered in the subconscious.

Oct 27, 2011

Key Management Skills to Be Successful Managers

The last one was obviously the true manager. Why? He has a vision and a big dream. This will help him a lot in making himself part of the business owner's team as their objective is to become the best stone cutter to build a cathedral or any other mega structure.But being successful also does not stop at having a big dream. You need to have skills to go with it - managing skills, that is.Would you like to have what the third stone cutter has and be regarded as a true manager? Check out these key management skills that you must possess.Technical skills. Lower level managers need technical skills. Although your subordinates perform the technical job, you can be a better manager if you know the technical aspects of the job. At most, you should know how to print bookmarks if you're a manager in a bookmark printing company. Even if you are in line with the top-level managers, you still need to know the technical skills involved in creating the best bookmark in the market. You can be more effective if you are familiar with the technical side of the job.Conceptual skills. Concepts make a big difference between success and failure of a business. The person who can conceptualize the future of a business is in better position to introduce innovations for business success. In fact, business opportunities are the products of ideas and dreams. The one who conceptualized the bookmarks for example became rich.
A gambler transformed a desert into an empire of wealth and pleasure which is now called Las Vegas.Interpersonal skills. The ability to relate well with people is certainly a plus factor in business. You don't have to be good looking like Brad Pitt to be a successful manager. Your interpersonal skills are what matters most in business. An entrepreneur, who understands the needs and what motives the individuals, and shows compassion and sincerity, is more likely to be successful. People are the most important asset of an organization. Therefore, they should be treated with dignity.Diagnostic skills. As an entrepreneur or manager, you must be able to identify and evaluate problems of the enterprise. Such skills are needed to correct or prevent situations from getting worse. A manager who can prevent problems from taking place is much better than the one who can solve problems. Individuals who always think of failures and other negative thoughts get exactly what they think. Their constant consciousness of failure or defeatist attitude gives them failure after another. The poor became poorer because they think of poverty. While the rich become richer because they think of wealth.
True managers always think of success that is why they always succeed.Analytical skills. Analyses are essential in all aspects of the business operation. For instance, analyses are needed in the formulation of goals and strategies for the business or organization. Such skills are also needed in problem solving and decision making process. Managers cannot avoid this. They will always and must make decisions. They always make decisions on how to improve their products, how to create new markets, how to increase consumers' satisfaction or how to maximize profits.To be an efficient and effective manager, you must possess the above skills that are vital in performing your function.Without an efficient and effective manager, a business organization cannot survive. Such managers are needed in a very competitive market. It is survival of the fittest, and the fittest is the one that has the best management skills in the market.

Oct 25, 2011

Build up Your Professional and Interpersonal Skills

Many organizations welcome sabbatical volunteers in India with work experience. You can pick a program that is related to your profession so that you can work together with local professionals and share your knowledge with them or become a volunteer in India in a new field which would give you a different experience and set of skills.One of the non-profit organizations that offer dynamic sabbatical volunteer opportunities and volunteer programs in India is GoVolunteerIndia.
The organization is based in Delhi with offices all over India. GoVolunteerIndia had placed more than 7,000 with over 400 credible NGO’s in the country.GoVolunteerIndia will make your Sabbatical a unique opportunity. Its sabbatical volunteer opportunities have been created to provide individuals and corporate organizations with a structured programme for their employees to participate in during a sabbatical.Ethical and enriching experience through a number of NGO’s can also be personally tailored to suit your interests, needs and requirements. The length of time for this programme is a minimum of 3 months; this allows you to gain the most of your sabbatical experience.
A snapshot of GoVolunteerIndia services include:
· Personalized volunteering opportunity
· Pre-departure support, including visa guidance and online briefing
· Airport pick-up
· In-country orientation, including a country-specific informational handbook
· 24/7 emergency support
· Mid-term assessment
If you work within a specific field and would like to put your skills into good use in a totally different environment on your sabbatical, volunteering abroad and become a volunteer in India is an excellent solution. Once you return from your career break, your volunteer India experiences can enhance your CV too!

Oct 23, 2011

Seven Managerial Skills For Successful Leadership

1. Technical Skills:
Technical skills are the skills necessary to understand the specific kind of work being done in an organization. Technical skills are of greatest importance at the supervisory level or first line managers.
2. Interpersonal Skills:
Interpersonal skills are the ability to communicate with, understand and motivate both individuals and groups.
3. Conceptual Skills:
Conceptual skills are the manager's ability to think in the abstract. Managers need the mental capacity to understand the overall workings of the organization and its environment.
4. Diagnostic Skills:
Successful managers also possess diagnostic skills that enable manager to visualize the most appropriate response to solution. Example - A manager can diagnose and analyze a problem in the organization by studying its symptoms and developing a solution.
5. Communication Skills:
Communicating Skills refers to the manager's abilities both to convey ideas and information effectively to others and to receive ideas and information effectively from others.
6. Decision Making Skills:
Decision making skills refer to the managers ability to recognize and define problems and opportunities correctly and then to select an appropriate course of action to solve and capitalize on opportunities.
7. Time Management Skills:
A time management skill refers to the manager's ability to prioritize work to work efficiently and to delegate appropriately. Effective managers usually have time management skills.
Again a successful manager should have the sense of social responsibility. The concept of social responsibility is not new. Although the idea was already considered in the early part of 20th century, it receive a major impetus with the 1953 book social responsibilities of the business man by Howard R Bowen, who suggested that business should consider the social implications of their decisions.
Specialist Opinion:
1) According to R.W. Griffin, "Social responsibility is the set of obligations an organization has protect and enhanced the social context in which it functions."
2) According to Bartol and Martin, "Social responsibility refers to the obligations of an organization to seek actions that protect and improve the welfare of society along with it won interests."
On conclusions, social responsibilities mean the ability of a corporation to relate its operations and policies to the social environment in ways that are manually beneficial to the company and to society.
Above these are ideas management and the social responsibilities of manager.

Oct 21, 2011

Elements Assist Develop Your Interpersonal Abilities

Regardless of how effective you're at work, still it'll take you nowhere in the event you treat your coworkers badly. Fortunately, there are various things you are able to do to improve these interpersonal skills and become the leader of the team.Each day we communicate and interact with other individuals and it is our interpersonal abilities that we use. These interpersonal abilities are also recognized as soft skills, people skills, or communication skills. Such abilities concentrate on how we make transactions with other individuals. Included in these transactions are how we communicate, our self confidence and our ability to listen and understand.Those with powerful interpersonal abilities have a higher probability of success in their field of endeavor, may it be professionally or personally. This occurs simply because interpersonal skills endow those individuals with endearing qualities such as confidence and charisma.
Though technical abilities are other skills essential for the success of our chosen personal and professional endeavor, interpersonal abilities are much more valuable abilities to develop simply because these are important to our personal relationships, professional lives and social affairs. Unlike, the hard skills, it is soft skills that we use each day.To assist you strengthen these soft abilities, you can develop the following skills:1. Always put on a happy face. Wherever you are, you may be at function or house, always wear your very best smile. In the event you smile often and have a pleased attitude, people will probably be drawn to you. Individuals that are always cheerful is usually showered with favors.2. Listen. One of the best methods to be productive at work is to have the ability to listen. Having this ability is advantageous at work simply because it enables you to comprehend what is expected of you, and build rapport with your employer and colleague.2. Listen. Having the ability to listen is among the ways to be successful at work.
With this capability, an employee can effortlessly understand what the employers require him or her to do, and can effortlessly build a rapport with fellow workers and also the employer.3. Give a positive feedback. Communication is really a procedure that entails elements like speaker, receiver and feedback. Usually communication fails because of the barriers that maintain each the speaker and the receiver to give a positive feedback. These barriers may be avoided in the event you choose the words you use, listen and empathize.It's stated that if you would like individuals to know you, you need to use clear and particular words. Utilizing such words facilitate communication between individuals as they make the meaning of the utterance clear; consequently, positive feedback may be generated. Moreover, you need to possess the capability to listen to ensure that you can get the concept of the information that the speaker sends. With this, you are assured which you can give a positive feedback. Lastly, understand the perspective of the speaker. Empathizing with him or her will permit you comprehend his behavior, giving you the opportunity to give an unprejudiced response.
 

Oct 19, 2011

Top Ten Interpersonal Skills You Can't Leave Home Without

Knowing how best to interact with others and knowing what to do in every social situation will not only help boost your confidence but it will also help you be perceived positively. The good news is the basic rules are very simple and will become natural to you with a bit of practice and application. In the event you already know the rules but are not applying them as often as you know you should, you might want to consider getting in the habit of presenting yourself at your best at all times. Good interpersonal skills appear natural and automatic – they don't feel awkward because you're not just bringing them out on special occasions while trying to remember what's in the rulebook.

The foundation for social skills, etiquette and good manners is respect. It's treating everyone respectfully and operating with mindfulness and awareness about how your behavior is affecting others. We all know what it feels like when we think someone has treated us disrespectfully, so it's easy to see why some version of the "Golden Rule" is still part of the philosophy of all the major spiritual traditions, and a growing number of corporate and small business cultures, as well.

Shake hands correctly. For both men and women a good handshake is firm, connecting the space between your thumb and forefinger with the same space of the hand you are shaking. Be sure not to grab just the fingertips. As well, make sure you don't bend your hand and extend just your fingertips. Fully connect and shake, using a gentle up and down motion from the elbow. Be mindful not to squeeze too hard or shake too long. Do not hesitate in extending your hand. Regardless of gender, shaking hands is the acceptable greeting and should be done again when you say good-bye.

Greet people effectively. Introduce yourself to people you do not know. Offer your hand, say your name slowly and clearly, and give a little information to help get the conversation going.

Introduce people properly. Learn the mechanics of both a business and a social introduction. In business, introductions are based on precedence, not gender. This means you would introduce a peer to your boss, where as your boss would be introduced to a client or customer. In social introductions, a person is generally introduced to an older or more "distinguished" person and in most circumstances a man is still introduced to a woman.

Stand up for introductions. Whether you are male or female, stand up when you are introduced to anyone and everyone unless there is a compelling reason for you not to do so, even when you hear, "Oh, don't get up."

Maintain eye contact. Maintaining good eye contact with the person you are talking to gives the impression that you care what they are saying and that you are respectful. Avoid staring by occasionally looking at another feature of the face.

Sound pleasant. Try not to be lazy in your speech. Whether we like it or not, we are all judged by the way we sound. Constantly using words such as "like," "you know," and "um" will not be to your best advantage.

Truly listen. Really listening to people is a skill that few fail to appreciate – almost everyone just loves a great listener. This skill alone will help you immensely and when coupled with the practice of never interrupting others, it is a sure winner.

Be aware of others. Be aware of how considerate your behavior is in public. Do you open doors for someone approaching behind you? Are you quiet and respectful in public places? Are you annoying others with your wireless phone conversation? How we treat people matters. The person you cut off at an intersection today may be the person you face at an employment interview tomorrow.

Be friendly. Smile. Be warm. Learn the social skills you need to be comfortable with all people and practice your new skills until you appear at ease wherever you are.

Oct 17, 2011

Do You Invest in Interpersonal Skills

There are many highly qualified and talented people searching for that next step on the ladder of employment. You can imagine that in a recession there are even more talented and qualified people out there fighting for every position. Even in the times of a buoyant economy over 30% of people in work are looking for alternative work. What does this mean to you? Quite simply it means that you first of all need a great CV to get your foot in the door and secondly, you will need a first class interviewing technique to secure the job. The pressure on the candidate is more intense now than for many years.There are a number of consistent themes which explain why lots of very well qualified and highly talented people are not in work.Talent is great! I wish I had more of it. Academic qualifications are great and I wish I had more of that too. But these attributes alone will not secure the job. The people that are offered the jobs demonstrate the most desire, the best preparation and are the most persuasive. It's a buyer's market during a recession and you have possibly thirty to forty-five minutes to make an impact.I recently worked with a group of graduates from a leading university in the South of England.


None of the group actually knew each other (which accounted for why they initially seemed a little timid) and none of them had managed to secure an internship in the holidays. They all brought their CVs along and I managed to have a good look at their achievements, which were academically outstanding. I had never seen so many straight A students in my life. But what very quickly became apparent during the sessions was that they were all totally focussed on themselves, their studies and interests and not really focussed on the nature of the businesses that they were applying too.Retail management is not a good fit if you have a qualification in Nordic Mythology. But a degree in Nordic Mythology is a good fit for being employed in a museum which promotes the history of the Vikings etc. But to work in a museum these days, the requirements are quite staggering.You need great commercial skills to run exhibitions, you need great communication skills to get sponsors on side; you need excellent client-facing skills to entertain the guests who attend your exhibitions.

 And it was these types of skills that were lacking. The basic every day business skills that would help the business grow and flourish.When we discussed this, there was an enormous groan of resentment. The interpersonal skills were lacking and they were almost unemployable. One of them suggested that eye-contact was not a requirement if you planned to spend your career with your head in a book. I was not surprised that he did not get the job after a remark like that.If you go for a job interview, you must demonstrate that you can add value to that company's bottom line. You must be confident and sell yourself and your skills. Book knowledge is fantastic, I wish I had more. The question always is: how do I turn academic knowledge into business value? How can I apply it to this business? What can I do to enhance their return on investment in me?

Balance Inter-Personal Skills With Professional Skills

Personal characteristics are specific to each individual, and include preferences regarding the self and relationships with others. Professional characteristics apply to occupation and public life in terms of role, qualifications, competence, and experience.Inter-personal characteristics include oral and written communications abilities, and the extent to which an individual is a team player. Individual contributors usually have less developed inter-personal skills than experienced entrepreneurs, leaders, and managers who are able to get things done through others.A personal style is a set of personality characteristics. Every individual has a personal style profile - specific personality characteristics that determine their preferences.Definitions of personal styles have been used throughout history by philosophers; modern definitions trace their roots to research work by Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung.
Although there are many themes and variations, basically four personal styles exist:Challengers - who appreciate action and adventure.Causals - who appreciate creativity and relationships.Stabilizers - who appreciate law and order.Visionaries - who appreciate innovation and understanding.By understanding how to quickly identify certain key attributes of each personal style, and to recognize them in other people, an individual can quickly relate, build a rapport, and interact with others. Hence, an individual is more likely to appear friendly and be able to influence others. "Relate" means that an individual has similar preferences to another; "rapport" means that an individual can build a relationship with another; and "interact" means that two or more individuals can do things together.Whereas there are more scientific approaches, two ways exist to quickly identify the personal styles of others.
 The first is to listen to the words that others use; the second is to observe how they dress. Words and dress are key indicators of values, attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors:Challengers use words that suggest the notions of competition, courage, energy, excitement, and incentives. They tend to dress casually.Causals use words that suggest the notions of acceptance, friendship, ideals, peace, and sharing. They tend to dress fashionably.Stabilizers use words that suggest the notions of budgets, loyalty, responsibility, safety, and security. They tend to dress formally.Visionaries use words that suggest the notions of analysis, competence, explanations, research, and solutions. They tend to dress functionally.If an individual can adapt their personal style to another's without losing their own, they can increase the likelihood of success in entertaining, informing, convincing, persuading, and negotiating to close transactions for mutual benefit.

Oct 11, 2011

Are Social Networks Destroying Interpersonal Skills

55.6 million adults in the United States alone have a social networking account with sites like Facebook, MySpace or Twitter. The average number of new Facebook registrations per day is 250,000! More and more of us choose to stay in more of the time. We talk and play with our cyber friends, or do business via our computers, rather than venture outside in the real world and do it "the old way".And why would we, when we can do pretty much everything and anything at the touch of a button and without shifting our bottomsWe can browse, search and join networks of all sorts, we can set up profiles, connect with family, co-workers and friends, we can even run our own cyber farms, without the hard work or the smells. We can upload our best ever pictures and fun videos, share our innermost thoughts with the world, make controversial and bold statements, comment freely on other peoples' posts.
We can request friends, accept, reject or ignore them, just because... we can peek, stalk and poke at will. We can even set up our own fan pages and instantly create an air of celebrity around us. Many of us find ourselves laughing at the computer, getting angry at things, and even crying.We flirt, start relationships and end them by simply clicking Block or Delete.But when we need a hug and a kiss, not of the cyber kind, of the kind that involves someone else enveloping you with their arms and sharing the warmth of their body and their energy with yours, or putting cheek to cheek... well, computers don't have arms, and if you have ever tried to kiss your computer, apart from running the risk of being a weirdo, you'll find it doesn't tend to kiss you back. And forget about those four thousand friends from all over the world that you haven't and will never meet in person. You can look, but you can't touch.
And, I don't know about you, but when someone sends me a virtual gift, I can't help but feel kind of cheated.Social networking has given way to a new social dynamic where we get to make friends from across the globe, but know nothing of our next-door neighbour. We are creating alternate realities made of superficial and sometimes false networks of strangers, and sometimes I wonder if this is an unavoidable result of a rapidly growing world, or if we are just plain lazy.Is this hyper connectedness destroying our social skills? What does this preference for text relationships over face to face interaction say about us? Are we unlearning how to naturally interact with other humans?While we are gaining a whole new set of social skills, we may be at risk of losing many of the interpersonal skills that can only be learnt via face to face interation, and which are the building blocks of a healthy, strong, and lasting self-esteem.

Oct 9, 2011

Paving Way for A Successful Professional Career

The only way to taste success is to possess the requisite soft skills that are ever so desired in organizations today. Read this article to get a fair idea about soft skills and their importance.Typically, soft skills are those attributes and interpersonal abilities that are part of an individual's complete personality. They ascertain how the person would act or react in a given situation. Soft skills are considered to be quite vital for anybody who wants to make it big in his/her career in various job sectors eg. Management, nursing etc. Unlike technical skills that tend to be specific to a particular kind of activity or task, soft skills are not specific but are broadly applicable.Soft skills if categorised into personal attributes would comprise: common sense, time-management, optimism, responsibility, sense of humour, integrity and motivation. Further, if categorised into interpersonal abilities would comprise: leadership, communication, empathy, good manners, sociability, etc. Today, soft skills are a pre-requisite, if someone is aiming to achieve prosperity in their career or business.
 Though, most people have this misconception that only technical skills are the requirement, they miss out on the fact that technical skills are not enough by themselves to boost a person's career growth.Many research studies carried out all over the world reiterate the fact that soft-skills like business etiquette; cultural sensitivity and good communication skills are quite helpful in generating global business. Thus they are completely indispensable to an individual and more so for the organisation that the individual works for. Many top organizations understand that employees with only technical expertise will not be able to generate business for them at a global level. Thus they seek for candidates who have a good command over their soft skills. Though, a lot of them are known to have introduced soft skill training sessions in their company, as part of the employee-training module.It is believed that with the help of soft skills, many cultural, language and environmental barriers can be easily crossed.
This is just the reason why there has been an increasing demand for soft skills training like Team Leadership Training, Managerial Training, Executive Training and Corporate Leadership Training. Fortunately many top training institutes have taken a step further to introduce online tutoring services and they provide people with the above-said training courses. Online skills training services are regarded as an effective means to learn soft skills, as one is not required to go anywhere and just has to take the course sitting at the home or office.At the beginning of one's career, though qualifications and technical skills might help to secure a good job. However, one has to realise that to move up on the success ladder, apart from personal traits, soft skills too would be an important asset especially in large organizations. The reason being the presence of similar technically skilled people in an organisation, make it even more important to acquire the proper soft skills, in order to reach to the next higher designation.Learning soft skills can be a huge investment for the future and if one has aimed for a successful career, nothing can be better than opting for a soft skills training program. It is said that technical skills can get a person a job, but what will keep him on the job is his soft skills.

Oct 7, 2011

Interpersonal Skills is a Key for Leadership

Different people have different personality types. In general, there are 4 main personality types that we need to understand if we want to be able to deal with people successfully. These 4 personality types are:

1. Analytical - Individuals who fall under this category are known to be very technical. They tend to analyse everything in details, they work based on facts and technical data. These individuals have low people skills because they tend to focus their ability on the technical aspects, and more often than not, they prefer to work alone. However, this doesn't mean that they cannot be trained to recognize the value of people and interpersonal skills. If you train and develop them properly, they can be your best managers or leaders in your business enterprise.

2. Driver - Individuals who fall under this category like to deal with people and focus on result. If they don't get good results, they will demand explanation from you. These individuals are very proactive, they want to see that things get done quickly. However, the main drawback od these individuals is that they can be very aggresive and offensive. If you are dealing with them, you need to exercise a lot of patience. These people are the leader type but they need to learn how to control their aggressiveness. If they do, they can be your best leaders.

3. Amiable - Individuals who fall under this category are very likeable. They avoid confrontations and disagreements, and often likes to please. An amiable person can be insecure so he needs constant affirmation and assurance from people that matter. Amiable people may possess people skills to some degree however their insecurities could limit their abilities.

4. Expressive - Individuals who fall under this category can easily show emotion either in words and expressions. They willingly help others in times of need but they despise rejection and are often afraid of it. These people can develop people skills as long as they are given proper guidance and are able to control their emotions.

In order to develop good people and interpersonal skills, you do need to understand the four main personality types that we mentioned above so that you can better deal with them. This can only serve as a guidance, it is not a fixed recipe, you need to understand that most people have mix personality types. You hardly find an individual who only possesses one personality type. But, most people have one particular personality type that is more dominant than another.As a leader or manager of a business enterprise, you do need to have the skills that allow you to interact with different types of people. You need to be able to make these people to work together and motivate them to achieve the same goals of your organization.

Oct 6, 2011

The Nature Of Interpersonal Skills

Confidence is essential for good interpersonal skills. Understanding how people function will make you better at functioning in a social settings and relating to anyone. Think for a moment about the qualities you look for in a friend. The chances are you are thinking about 'mutual benefit.'To say that we look to gain from friendships is not being selfish, but it is being truthful. However, true friendships are also built on a desire to give something back whether this is materially, with laughter or as a shoulder to cry on. It often feels better to give than it does to receive. True friendship is therefore built on the principle of mutual need and benefit. People tend to gravitate towards others who are most like them. Our friendship groups tend to consist of likeminded individuals. We tend to share common interests like taste in music, attitudes, beliefs. Regarding the last couple of points, think about how much you judge others according to the company that they keep. Many of the prejudices we form stem from the people we see them hanging around with.You will already know how easy it is for you to strike up a rapport with people who are like you. If conversation ever starts to dry up, you can start talking about sports or interests you share in common. In these circumstances we feel more relaxed, secure and extroverted in our surroundings.

So what happens once you get taken away from your comfort zone?Of course, not every person you need to form a relationship with is going to have similar interests to yourself. The people I am referring to here include colleagues and business partners. 'What (you might ask) am I supposed to do here? How can I build rapport with these people that I share nothing in common with? There is a technique known to body language experts called 'mirroring'. Mirroring is a conscious effort to relax an individual by affecting the subconscious region of the mind.If this sounds a bit twilight zone for you then I urge you to read on, for mirroring is actually very simple.We mentioned earlier how people enjoy being around similar people; however, being similar does not just mean wearing the same type of clothes but the type of signals we give off.

Psychologists reckon that 95% of all communication is non verbal which means that there is a massive window of opportunity to communicate with people, even those who you do not share anything in common with culturally!Mirroring is used all over nature. Scientists studying wolves have noticed how the rest of the pack will ape the behaviour of the alpha male. Even our day to day life, mirroring can be observed all the time. The next time you are on a date watch how your date reacts to you. If they follow your hand gestures, smile when you do, speak in the same tone, then the chances are you are on to a winner. In a business setting making a good impression is vital, so use mirroring to your advantage. If you are looking to make a good impression on your boss then follow their lead by adopting a similar posture, volume of voice, similar facial patterns and nodding when they nod. There is, of course, a bit of common sense needed here or you will end up looking a bit strange or even being offensive! Try to incorporate mirroring subtly into your behaviour pattern because it needs to be registered in the subconscious.

Oct 5, 2011

Interpersonal Skills Is Important Than Hard Skills

It took me five years to learn that the best answer is not as good as a practical answer that have executive buy in and champions who are willing to implement the solution. This is just one interpersonal skills example of why interpersonal skills are more important than hard skills. I think of hard skills as what it takes to develop the perfect solution to a business issue. I define Interpersonal Skills as our ability to build relationships with others to effectively understand their circumstances, communicate our proposed solution based on their business reality, and persuade them to take action. Only when we combine soft skills like interpersonal skills with our hard skills can we be the most effective in business.Here is another example of why interpersonal skills are more important than hard skills. I went to the dentist yesterday to do a routine cleaning. I was given a new dentist (Dr. Vo) at the same office. I'm not particular scared of dentists nor fond of the experience. It's just something to get done.

 As soon as she started examining me, she started "scolding" me about waiting too long for a cleaning (it's been a year) and not flossing enough as I had gum bleedings and sensitivities in some teeth. It made me tense but I said nothing. Then she told me I may have the beginning of cavities on three teeth (no actual cavity yet) and she started again on telling me that I waited too long for a cleaning. After using the same tone to "scold" me three times, I asked her to stop repeating herself. After the cleaning, I promptly told the front desk to always give me only my old dentist (Dr. Sood) for future appointments even if I have to wait longer to get an appointment.My experience there is what prompted me to write this article. Was my cleaning well done this time? Yes. Did Dr.

 Vo gave me the best diagnosis? Probably. Dr. Vo had all the hard skills to give me her best answer. Yet, I left with a "bad taste" in my mouth because of her interpersonal skills. Nobody wants to feel stupid or wrong during a business transaction even if they were. The business world is not too different. People and companies value good customer experience, practical solutions, and a tactful way for communication. We may think business decisions are made mainly based on logic, but it would be a naive assumption. Here are three more interpersonal skills examples illustrating their importance in businessMajor deals are signed on golf courses - why? Interpersonal skills were used to build close relationships (through common interest like golf) and the trust built using these interpersonal skills leads to signed deals.When other logic factors are equal (like price, convenience, delivery time, etc..), people usually choose the vendor where they had prior good relationships instead of a new ones. Sometimes, people will even choose a higher price with their current vendor because they value the existing experience rather than wanting to risk having a bad experience with a new, lower priced one.

A mediocre solution that have executive buy-in will get implemented over a more perfect solution created in a black box. This is the lesson I learned in consulting. It's great to be smart (hard skills), but if I don't have the interpersonal skills to understand my clients, what's practical to implement in the company's current circumstances, and how to best persuade them to take action, I will not be able to make any impact.These interpersonal skills examples all show an important lesson especially for those with exceptional hard skills, like engineers, programmers, accountant, scientist etc... Many struggle to transition from these roles to management because of either1) lack of understanding of the importance of soft skills like interpersonal skills and communication skills or 2) don't know how to develop these skills. One thing is sure, if you want to reach senior management level in any business, interpersonal skills to develop relationships with your team, peers, clients, and vendors will be essential.